Chapter 10 : Thank You's

Your wedding is a very important time for you.  Of course, it is also one of the most costly events that will happen in your life as well.

Therefore, a big old thank you is appropriate for everyone that does anything for your wedding, little or small, to make it a memorable one.

The list goes on and on and while most people will say that they just want you to be happy, you should provide them all with appreciation in one form or another for what they are doing for you.  This goes doubly for parents that are paying for the wedding (and all your desires and quirks!) 

There are several important things to remember when it comes to saying thanks.  You should be giving these throughout the next year or so in big ways to those that help you through this very stressful time.

Thank You Notes

The first thing that is a big thank you to provide is that of the bridal shower.  If you have any type of celebration before this in which you are given gifts or special treatment, thank you notes should also be applied here.

In fact, head to the local stationery store and pick up a lot of thanks you notes.  You’ll need most of them!  Pick out ones that match your wedding invitations or pick out something else.  Just have them on hand to send out quickly.

The Wedding Shower

When it comes to the thank you notes that you will be writing for your wedding shower, you need to carefully consider what you are doing here.  Here are some very important etiquette tips you need to follow for wedding thank you notes for your shower.

  • A personal note is the only way to go.  Just telling someone thank you is not enough and is considered very impolite.  You need to pen a personal note to them to tell them how grateful you are that they took the time to provide you with this gift.
  • Do not send pre printed thank you notes.  This is tacky and can give the impression of just being after the gift.  You should hand write your thank you notes so you provide your gift givers with a clean appreciation of what their gift has meant to you.
  • Your thank you note should mention the type of gift that they gave you.  Thanking them for the beautiful china with a pattern that you love is more appropriate and better taken than just saying thanks for the gift.  Make sure to personally mention what gifts have been given to you.
  • Those that throw the wedding shower for you should also be thanked through a personal, hand written thank you note.  If they also provide you with a gift as well as the shower help, then you can thank them for both in the same thank you note.
  • Thank your guests quickly for the gifts that they give you.  You should send out thank you notes within ten days of your wedding shower.  You should send out thank you notes for your wedding gifts within two weeks of returning from a honeymoon.   If you get a wedding gift at a different time, then send a thank you note as soon as possible.
  • Personalize the thank you note by using this trick.  Instead of saying “I” throughout the note, say, “you” in it.  This way, the information is provided to your gift giver in a way that shows the value that they have by giving this gift.
  • Use black or blue ink to write your thank you notes.  This is the best method for doing so as it can provide the clearest reading ability as well as provides for a formal tone.
  • If you receive more than one gift from anyone on separate occasions, you should pen two separate thank you notes, one for each.  If they give you two gifts on the same day, then both can be included in the thank you note.
  • When you address your envelopes, make sure that your new address, if you have one, is what is used on the front, return address.  This allows your gift givers to have your new address.
  • If more than one person gave you the gift, you should write an individual thank you note for each person.  If there are more than ten people that have given you the gift, then one note to all of them is sufficient.  This depends on the size and cost of a gift.   A very expensive gift should warrant a thank you note for each person regardless.
  • Take you time when writing your thank you notes, to make sure that they are neat and well written.  It shows that you took the time to care for them and thank them in a personal way.

Wedding Gifts

When your wedding rolls around, you will likely have even more gifts to write thank you notes for.  These gifts are likely to be more of a monetary nature though.  Yet, any type of gift that you get for your wedding you need to properly take note of.

Wedding gifts of a monetary nature should be thanked in a generic way.

“Thank you so much for your check” or “Thank you so much for your monetary gift” is appropriate here.  You should not include the amount of the gift in the thank you note.  But, you can tell the person that is sending you the gift what you will use the money for should you have this figured out. 

For example, telling them that you are putting the money towards your down payment on a new home is a great way to show them how well spent their money will be.

All gifts given to you at your wedding should receive the same type of personal thank you note.  If you are getting something from anyone, provide them with a note of thanks that comes from the heart as it will make many people quite happy.

Make sure to provide thank you notes to all of those that have helped to make your wedding what it is too.  This would include those that paid for it and those that helped in your wedding party. 

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